THINKING BACK ....

All those times he acused me of chaeting and lien 2 him, when he was doing it 2 me :s , a;ways acusing me of something that he was guilty off !!

you no what i should have gone out and done all of those things he said i was doing , cos he was doing it !!!

i might as wel have cheated on him , as much as he acused me of cheating , i might as wel have lied as much as he acused me of lien , i might as wel have gone to the clubs as much as he acused me of cluubin , i might as wel have givein away my love !

I SHOULD HAVE CHEATED !!!!!!!!

Were not een together no more , were just friends but even now im getin acused , even now hes still lien 2 me , when i ask about that abbie girl the one he CHEATED on me with , the gyal i should have knocked ten shades of shit out of , the one hu stole my love !

But you no what i know he gettin back with her cos ive got my sources, i no hes sedning her songs , i no he rang her up begging for her back , im such a fukin mug and a half and yet im stil sat herebeing his friend eeven after hes ripped my heart out wel all i can say is when he gets back with her and she fuks him ova and all that , i hope he regrets it ,cos he wil alredy no where he shud have bin n thats with ME , oh wel when he realises that i will be happy with someone else and all the lads i talk 2 about it or ask if i have a bf the laads that arnt just out for sex but for a relationship , they all say hes an idiot for given u up, tbh i dnt fink there right but alot of ppl have said it 2 me and there like oh wel his loss , if hes like that in the first place , he can and wil b like that again , your gona make some one so happy some day jorja mercedes!!!!


Wel his loss, im never gona b with him again , or be like it was the friendship way , all dead and gone cos hes ruined it !!! ohh well like i say movin on time baby , i just hope he gets happy with sum gyal ! cos i wont let the past ruin or fuk up other relationships im gna have !


That was the end of something speciaal , but the start of something new !

IVE CHANGED MY MIND, I DONT LOVE HIM NO MORE (KINDA POEM) LOL, THE GIRL IS ME :(

There's this girl I know, so deep in love ,Do almost anything ,to make him see she's the one ,but he doesn't feel a girl like her ,He's so, so wrapped up ,Cause the average girl , will give him anything he wants!

It's the funniest thing cause I , know how I feel inside ,but you never felt the same as I ,I miss him so much ,I bet you don't even notice ,and he don't even realise



He's so caught up ,He won't call her ,He shows no love ,So she decides!


I changed my mind , I don't love you ,I don't love you no more ,Don't waste my time!

What you thinkin'? When you see me on the corner and you see me hagin' out ,Niggas on the street, don't care what it's all about!

JEES HAVE I FOUND HIM ?

IM OVER HIM , AND I THINK SOMEONE IS STEALING ME HEART WITHOUT ME EVEN KNOWING , OHH COULD BE ALL THOSE THINGS I WANT HMMMMMMMMMMMMMM

Him - so when u look for love wht do u wnt the boi 2 be like

Hussey -( the long list below )

Him- jorja , i sware to u , i will be all of those things and do all of those things 2 make u happy , no one wil eva love u the way i wil and do !

him - Your an amazing girl , one of a kind , like an angel, ur ex is a bloody fool i would give anyfin 2 have bin him , ur really special ur nt like most gyals , i sware on my lyf im not just sayin this , ur bloody amazing!

IS THIS HIM ? THAT BLOODY QUICKLY

JJJJJJEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEES ...... CONFUSED !!!!

HAPPY HUSSEY GYAL !!!!

X

DEAR MR EX,

I'm sitting lookin' out the window like, damn,Tryna fix the situation thats at hand,You still running through my mind, When I'm knowin' that you shouldn't be,Me I'm on your mind,And I'm knowin' that it couldn't be,Cause you ain't called ,I ain't even apauled, I ain't dealt wit it all,I been runnin' round wit other boys, I'm single and they lovin' it, I'm liking it,But I just want the one that I was in love wit, Thats not the end of it ,I'm tryna let you go, I cant get a grip of it is what ,I'm trynna let you know , You got a hold of some kinda control of me ,
I don't know what it is
But I gotta get you gone from me
I'm working at it
And it ain't getting no better
Just tryna be like
Yea, forget it, whatever
Instead of staring out this glass
Looking at this bad weather
Damn, I gotta pull myself together

FIGHT OR GET ON , MOVE ON, LIVE LIFE TO THE FULLEST

ooh jjjeeeees back to him again , what do i do , fight for him to get back with him or just move on and live life and just havin him as a mate !!

I just got in , and ive never seen so many couple in my life , to night everyone seamed to be out with there other half , made me sad, this lad was playin with his girlfriends hands , n kiissin then and stroking them like he used 2 do to me , just made me think , i really want some one who can love me , tbh mayb its a security thing i dnt have a clu , just wish someone would love me , dnoooo lol

Just when i see people out and about together its like ohhhh noo :( i wish it was me , i just want someone to love , to care for , to care for me, to weight on hand and foot lol just someone 2 b there for me jorja mercedes , someone who would take me weird and wonderful places , show me things ive only every dreamt about , someone who could give me the world and i would give them everything in return!

someone who would give somthin up for me , someone who would kiss me in the rain , some one who would defend and fight for me , someone who could love me for me and not anything else , some one who wants 2 sleep together with out having sex , some one who could wisper swet nothings in my ear , someone who could make me smile , make me wet myself laughinh , some one who wouldnt just b my boyfriend but my best friend , someone who shares my dreams , some one who likes everything i do , some one clever, who can teach me wkd fings that ive never known

some one i could trust with my life, someone who would make me safe , some one hu neva wants to let go of me , someone who could look in to my eyes and tell me how he feels about me and out relationship. some one who invited me round just 2 watch big bro or x factor or hollyoaks 2 gether , some one who could hold me when im scared , some one who could understand where im coming from , someone who would come out what ever the weather , rain, snow , shine , haill, some one who could take me on picnics , some one who when i cried wiped my tears


WHERE THE HELL IS HE ,,, FIND ME PLEEASEEEEEEEE , ILL BE WAITING LOL


X
X

YEAH BABY YOGA

HOW BWT A SESSION OF HUSSEY GYAL AT 3 IN THE MORNIN AMZINNNNNNNNNN!!!!!!!!

HMMMMM WEIRDO

ORGASM OR SINGIN ........ SINGIN I REKON LOL ...SINGIN I HOPE LOL ..... SINGIN I NO !!!!!

SHINEY EYES BABY !!!!!!!!

TAKE A LOOOOOOOOK !

WHO FELL OVA ???

SHHMMMEEEEE JORJA MERCEDES LOLOLOLOLOL SILLY BILLY !!!!!!!!!

DEAR GOD

DONT EVEN ASK

UPSIDE DOWNER

DEARNT BUT THIS ANYWHERE ELSE HAHAHAHAH I DNT EVEN MEMBER DOIN THIS , BUT I NO IT MDE ME SIK EWWWW LOL ANYHU WAS A WKD NYT FRM WHT ICAN MEMBER LOL ;) X

COOFEEEE HELPS A HELL OF ALOT ;)

oohh yeah baby i needed that coffe at like 5 in the mornin lol

FUN FUN FUN

NO MORE BOYS JUST ME :D

Its movin on time baby :D

me n him well were friends which is wkd :D ,im really hapy bwt that but i dnt fink it wil help me move on yano still bein friends with him cos

number 1 - im scared of fallin in love with him agen !

number 2 - My dream i had , i will meet him in a few years!

awwww hes bloddy wkd lol, when i was with him i cud let my heair dwn :D i cud say anyfin crazy and he wud catch me ryt b4 i hit the ground! Hes really funny, clever, im not even gona cary on anyhu , i dont need a man 2 make me happy, but i think i do , but i really dont, ive got my girlies , bein single isnt a bad lyf at all , not bin singal in quite a while but the singal life could b a gd one :D ,

i love meetin new ppl , but i cud b new ppl if i wasnt single hmmmmmmmmmmm lol
anyhu at the moment im really happy , im happy hes my friend , im happy that i dnt even no , im just really happy ! Hes a wkd friend , we talk bwt sum of the most radum stuff eva :D take the mik , wel he dus 2 me by calling me peter kay lol
just cos i have a bolton accent aw sumit like that :s

anyhu , im really happy right now , but i dno why . I hope one day when he gets old and looks back on his life i hope he see's that he lost sumit that wud LOVE him like no other. I hope he finds a wkd wife and has the most beautiful children in the hole wide world , well mine will be the beautifulist , his will b the 2nd hehe

awwwwwwwwwwwwwwwww i really cnt wait to grow up have babies , settle dwn and get married , but before i do all of that i cnt wait to LIVE propa cos as soon as i hit 18 im out of ths place , japan,spain,jamcia etc etc here i cum :D i wnt a new job every month and i dont wna stop havin fun and seein great thing , and taking loads of pictures im just soo excited , cos its only 2 years , 6 months and 3 days away :D until im gone wooohoo and hopefully on my jorney i will find the love of my life

woooooooooooohooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooooo :D

Who knows what life holds but i hope its gna b a really gd one , mke up for the shitty childhood!! and i hope hes in my lyf when im older , i hope hes my best friend , the god farther to my babies , my nextdorr neighbour :D

:D :D :D :D


X
X

omg ive just realised that i love him ,so so much , what the hel am i gona do :( !!

Yes I love him. I love him more than anything else in this world and there is nothing that I would like better than to hold on to him forever. But I know it's not for the best. So no matter how much my heart is going to break, I've got to let him go so he can know just how much I love him. Maybe if I'm lucky, he'll come back, but if not, I can make it through this!

I really do wish i could say all of this but i really can't , really , really can't

I'm not supposed to love you, I'm not supposed to care, I'm not supposed to live my life wishing you were there. I'm not supposed to wonder where you are or what you do...I'm sorry I can't help myself, I'm in love with you!



You may not love me today, tomorrow, or ever, but I will love you until it kills me, and, even then, you'll be in my heart.

Love is when you shed a tear and still want him, it's when he ignores you and you still love him, it's when he loves another girl but you still smile and say I'm happy for you, when all you really do is cry
I do that :( , i still love him but i don't know what to do , wait and hope it goes away :s , so confused :( !

Meeting you was fate, becoming your friend was a choice, but falling in love with you I had no control over.

I wish i could say this to him, over the phone, in person,but he just dosn't really care , really want to know.

I wish he could love me , just a percent of how much i love him because i love him that much even that small percent would be a big bit!

I need to let him go , i wanted to be his wifey , i wanted to be the mother to his children thats all over .

And the search continous for that one special boy,man


Never love anyone the way i love him, never because its impossible.

Life isn't ..... the same , but it goes on.

Mercedes-Hussey-x

APPARANTLY IM THAT GIRL, I FEEL , THINK , ALL OF THOSE THINGS HIS LOSS EY, SO THEY SAY!

To every girl who
dresses CUTE
not SKANKY.


To every girl who
wants to be called BEAUTIFUL
not HOT


To every girl...
that will spend her
whole day looking
for the perfect present for YOU.


To every girl who...
gets her heart BROKEN,
because he chose
that stupid BITCH instead .


To every girl...
that would DIE
to have a DECENT boyfriend.



To every girl who...
would JUST ONCE
like to be treated like a PRINCESS!


To every girl...
that cries at night
because of another HEARTBREAK


To every girl...
that WON'T get
down on her knees && open
her mouth just to get a BOYFRIEND


To every girl...
that just wants to HOLD HANDS


To every girl
that KISSES him with meaning.


To every girl who...
just wishes he CARED MORE


To every girl who...
would JUST ONCE
want a guy to give their
JACKET UP when they are cold.


To every girl who...
just wants him to call.
to hear I LOVE YOU


To every girl who...
lies awake at night THINKING about HIM


To every girl...
that just wants to CUDDLE.



To every girl that.....
just wants to sleep with
him without HAVING SEX


To every girl that....
shows how much she CARES
and gets NOTHING BACK..


To every girl that...
thought "maybe this
one could be "THE ONE."


To every girl that...
laughs at stupid stuff when she actually
>>DOESN'T<< think it is FUNNY.


To every girl who....
is just looking for that ONE and ONLY.
and is having a ROUGH TIME along the way.


To every girl that...
DOESN'T want a guy who just PLAYS with her
EMOTIONS but actually CARES about how she feels.


To every girl who...
wants words BACKED UP with actions.


To every girl that..
fell for all the LIES
only to find themselves ALONE in the END.


To every girl that...
gave her HEART
away to have it shoved back in her FACE.


To every girl that...
has faith that
"TOMORROW will be a better day."
And it will be.

TH3 LAST ON3 .......

Omdz im stuck in bloody limbo right know and its so hard to right my feelings down cos i no HES WATCHING ME .... so im gettin a new blog :D lol


i thinkk .... tbh i dnt even no im so confused right now , i want him back but theres not a chance in a million gaziilion years, i really do need 2 move on dont i
yep i think i stil do love him, i mis him so much , so much , so bloody much lol


i miss the lil things he dus 2 me , the lil things he says , the way he smiles at me , i miss lookin into those big blue eyes of is, but im just going 2 have 2 deal wiv it the way i deal wiv everything else , i no theese feelings will pas in tym.
i no they will

he taught me so much , so so so so much , im so lucky i had a chnace wiv him tbh :D so lucky, hu eva gets him next will b a luky luky gyal , very luky !!!




i no your reading this right now but you shoudnt be lol

but here you go sumit 4 ya , and yes i do stil love u :( :( :(



When i think back on theese times and the dreams we left behind, im glad because i was bless to get , to have you in my life, :D,
when i look back on theese days i look and see your face , you were right there for me .
In my dreams i'll always see u sore across the sky , in my heart there will always be a place for you for all my life , i'll keep a part of you with me and every where i am there you'll be :D


I ALWAYS WILL REMEMBER THE STRENGHTH U GAVE 2 ME !YOUR LOVE MADE ME MAKE IT THROUGH I OH SO MUCH TO BECAUSE YOU WERE RIGHT THERE FOR ME !

I cant help but love u and im sorry , it wil pass in a tym , few days few weeks,few months mayb , but right now , right this second, im very much so still love u :( :( :(


my last blog i am writing , and i am making a new one


tatarrr
x
x
x

AM I STUPID !!!

Wel jeeess this lad im talking to him , on the fone , tetxting , msn like back in the day befoere we went out , im tryna get on wiv lyf ,i dont hold grudjess and i wont start now , my best mate is callin me daft but tbh i wud love 2 her in my poistion and what she would do and what she would have done. i dont think i lopve him anymore , i think all the felings have gone , they have been ruuined etc
but am i bein a nob talking to him , i dont feel any hate wht so eva towards him , he made a mistake, we all make mistakes , but this time his mistake cost him sumthin tbh i dont no wht that is 2 him.

But now im tryna get on, it was a week 2 day , is that 2 soon 2 b moving on ? i dnt wnt 2 b miserbable ova him ,cos wht is the point , there isnt one , yes he has hurt me , yes he had fuked up my trust issues i have alredy , yes he has broken my heart, but live goes on , i have soo many things to look forward to in live and im 15 , there r gna b other people i fall in love wiv , there are gna b other boys that i think omg this is the one , and mayb i wil feel the same as i am feelin now iv everyone of them after we finsh, i have 6 years left until i finsh skwl . coledge and uni and start 2 go travelling wel 7 years cos im think im taking a year out , (lazy ggyal i no lol )


maybe he is the one , was the one , i wiil neva no now , but im zure i will find that one or that one will find me , I HOPE ,


i had a dream about him the other night and i told him about it , was about us re-meeting in 10 years and i hasd babies etc and we were best friends etc
i think it made him a lil sad but tbh i dno why but anyhu i realy cant w8 to have a baby i really cant , im so excited , i think i will have 2 give in sometime soon mayb when i have finshed my gcse's or a-levels , im ready to have ababy hehe I REALLY CNT W8, wohooo hehe lol maybe with the next boyfriend :D ifhes luky noo if im luky lol


my sleeping is getin better, my eating is the same , wel im drinking now lol ,,,
im gettin ova him i fink , just the eating bit think that wil the stya the same for a bit.



wel im going in to hopital next week , i think lol i wasnt listening to the dates

so il update :D


x
x
x

WHY , WHY , WHY ME ???:( (u)

Why me ey

just found out that boy , that one person hu ive eva really loved and trusted has been cheating on me , i dno how to feel , ive been in this situation before but i was madly in love wiv him if u no wht i mean , the one person in the world i thought i cud trust now i trust no one, but the fing is i sed 2 him tym and tym agen
if ur gna cheat on me or feell the need 2 FINSH ME FIRST and i sed it tym and tym agen , and i told him last week that i was havin dreams about him cheating on me and hahah u no wht he sed 2 me , YOU MUST VE FEELING GUILTY ABOUT SUMTHING,
i was gd 2 him yano , i dint look at others boys while we was out 2 gether , i dint stand there and chek them out , i neva lied 2 him and neva eva eva dreamed of cheating in him, soo why me ? :( , i was there for him when he needed me

and i cant cum 2 terms that he has actually dun this 2 me , but its weird cos im really really angry at the gyal hu he slept wiv soo angry, even though she dint no he had a gyal friend i want to go round and hurt her , i really wna beat her up , but thats nt like me really im not that kind of person , but i no my emotions wil chnage dramaticllay over the next few days , one day i may nt care , one day i myt wnt 2 kil her , myt one 2 kil him , bujt when ppl ask me about it they like why havnt u beat him up or gna round and at least smaked him in the face :s :s

and i realy really dont no y i havnt dun that alredy i really dont !!!!

aparntly its unnatural not tp go round and kill them both !!!

and the thing that hurts me most is that when he fed me all the bullshit about y he was unhappy , he gave me hope for the futar sayin when things can b diff we cud get bak 2 gether but he was lien 2 me , he neva loved me , i was just there yanoo , hes full of shit , hes nt the person i fort he was , i dont no whats happend 2 him

i just really really cant belive he has dun this 2 me , i just about sleep , but when it cums 2 eatin im starvin but i cnt eat anyhu finks thats umit rong wiv inside of me

i dont want 2 falll in love agen because that person , i loved with deart live lied 2 me cheated on me and all the rest he has dun , i wna b alone for a bit i fink , n sort out skwl and col and that ,

cant w8 2 go traveelin when im older i really cant :D finks its gna b , ireland first , then spain , carabein, japan 2 b honet i dnoo lol , but i will finnsiish of in ireland :D

i shud just take this in my stride and learn from it but its hard

TIME IS A HEALER


X

THE 3ND OF SOM3THING SP3CIAL

yesterday was the worse day for me when me and my boyfriend split up , neither of us wanted it 2 happen but it had 2 happen , he loved me but the situation we were in was making him miserable and i loved him that much i would do anything to make him happy al over again even if that ment it would make me unhappy, and its making me miserable right now , i carnt sleep , eat i cant get my mind straight on anything and knowing i have just lost that one thing i have ever truly loved kills me !!!
Me and him had our lives planned 2 gther and i feel no asif thats all gone and im gna have 2 plan out my life all over agen but on my own, i cant see my self being with anyone but him, i really cant i dont want anyone but him and im gonna b single for a long time to come cos i dont wany anyone else!

last nyt was my first nyt alone without him , i could sleep i sat up all nyt in my bed wishing thigs were differnt ,telling myself i will get over him in tym, its been a day and im already feelin the way i do , i dnt wnt 2 feel like this for months to come,he was my holeworld what am i gona do without him !

everytime i get a txt i jump up and hope 2 god its him tellin me he made a mistake but its either a m8 askin if i wana cum out or go out clubin 4 a bit but i dnt wna do all that stuff , he got sum kinda control of me!


i feel asif my heart as been pulled out , im heartbroken but i hope in tym missing him and the pain i am feelling ryt now will fade, but my love for him wil neva fade ,

makes me cry when eva i think about the places he took me and the fings we did the things we talked about,


if i wud have nown that last kiss would have been our last kiss i wud have neva stopped kissing him , if i wud have known the last tym that i held his hand wud have been the last tym i wud neva have let go !


i love him soo much there are no words , i felt complete with him , i felt there was no one else for me he made me fell things i have neva felt in my life!

THIS WAS TRUE LOVE


AND I CANT LET GO OF IT

I MIS HIM


I LOVE HIM


XOXOXOXOOOX